Candice is really “something else” as Ian said. She came as a airhead in the beginning, hairdresser and beauty counselor extraordinaire. All skinny jeans, flat soled boots with pom-poms, she spent more time on her behind in the freezing snow than vertical the first day she landed. She is in snowy and slippery Oregon to visit her pregnant BFF, welcomed on the Mackenzie’s ranch.

When City Girl stays on a ranch where staying vertical in cute shoes is a challenge, she has to adapt. I loved how I underestimated her. I read her as a silly and superficial girl but she is fiercely loyal, determined, combative with a heart of gold. She keeps her quirks all right (Mr Google) but she soon fires guns, help cows give birth, does U turn with ginormous trucks to drive her “giving birth” best friend to the hospital and kill mountain lions while protecting the hot brooding bad boy Ian Mackenzie.

Ian, heartsick and prick for three years now never saw her coming. They soon bicker and banter like teenagers, fighting in snow and hay. A butt naked Ian is carrying Candice on his shoulder just because she made sure his shower was cold.

Their banter is funny but what really had me in fits of laughter was all that happened to Candice. Talk about turn of events, that girl is a walking disaster or has bad karma but I could not stop shaking as I laughed so hard.

If I had a bad day, Rosie had a string of bad dates. It’s incredible the bad luck that girl could have trying to lose her virginity! Imagine Ben Stiller in” There’s Something About Mary” and you get the vibe of this book.

Rosie is living with her two best friends and has quite a crappy job, writing about cats secrets and cat poop and… She wants to write romance novels but there is this slight problem of her still being a virgin. She’s been raised sheltered by her parents and can’t even utter the “P” word to speak about the male appendage. Try using Briar Patch or Pleasure Garden and see if the readers will give you any credit as a romance novelist.
Pushed by her friends, she’ll launch herself on the date quest in the hope of finding the coital bliss and gather live experience to write her story. If the road to Hell is paved with good intentions, Rosie’s road to “post-virginity” land is paved with puke on sword, panty puffing clouds of baby powder, torn jeans airing her crotch, pervert dog licking private parts while ogling make out sessions and learning blow jobs on a banana among other things.

”After just grabbing my banana and flicking my tongue across it, I can see the aPEEL. God, I’m so funny. After my blowjob crash course, I feel like I can tackle the world, one penis at a time…hopefully.”

Suffice to say this book is like a collection of all dates turned bad. Prepare to break into hoots of laughter, cringe sometimes and cheer for Rosie and her “sex-periments”.

When Sam Stocking ”As in ‘hung by the chimney with care” meets Noel Holiday on their way back home for Christmas holiday, their lives will be forever altered. Both stranded at Chicago airport, they’ll enjoy each other’s company after Noel soaked Sam’s camo pants in beer. Noel is now jobless, homeless and has fled her boyfriend to go home for the holiday but fear her mother’s reaction.
Sam agrees to help Noel with her family and pretend to be her 12months boyfriend but he’s barely crossed her family’s threshold when he is groped by a big “woman”, gripping his crotch to check his “huge package”. Meet Bobbie, Noel’s transvestite Ancle and ecstasy lover, member of this insane family. Between Noel’s father, proclaiming Sam has had “enough of his daughter’s cottage cheese” and hiding all the dairy products, Noel’s mom forcing them to kiss under the mistletoe that’s more of pot tied with a ribbon to…. well, you get the gist of it.

This crazy eccentric family had me laughing so hard I could not breathe.